As I was signing the hospital admission papers I asked what the date was - I knew it was close to midnight - and the nurse replied April 15th. Mike couldn't help but laugh as I asked if she was serious. It was also at that point I realized all of the paperwork was in Spanish. Minor details.
Rewind to Thursday night into Friday morning when I started feeling labor pains - inconsistent contractions yet different from the ones I'd been having for weeks. I dropped Lily off at preschool and worked from home for most of the day. I had three important things on my to-do list before I could actually go into labor. At least that's what I was telling myself. I got through everything, caught up with my amazing co-worker covering my leave, and headed off to the OB for my 39 week appointment.
I tried convincing the Dr. that no one wanted to deliver my baby on Easter and we should just go on down to the hospital but at only 3cm dilated she wasn't budging. She reassured me that it was progress - the previous week I hadn't shown any signs of progress so this was good! And after all, my OB Dr. Anderson was on call all weekend. She delivered Lily and it was fate. Go home and rest she said.
So I picked Lily up from school and home we went. We made dinner and picked up the house and then my contractions started to get more regular. I should have gone to sleep but of course I had to catch up on the latest episode of Designated Survivor. About 10:00 I knew she was coming soon. We called my brother who came and picked up Lily. This was the first time I cried. As she looked at me over Mike's shoulder, still half asleep, she gave me a little wave and said I love you, as Mike took her out to the car. Our entire world was changing.
I tried to sleep but my contractions were just getting stronger and closer. When we finally got admitted into triage, I was 5 cm dilated and my contractions were about 5 minutes apart. Dr. Anderson poked her head in to let me know they'd be moving me to a delivery room and we took a short walk down the hall, where our nurse, Kelsey, put in my IV and drew blood in between contractions. We had been in the delivery room for a very short time when I told her I felt like I needed to push. She said it was likely just some pressure of her moving down but she'd check me again - I was 9 cm and Kelsey was on the phone calling in the doctors to deliver. Thankfully I had opted not to have an epidural from the beginning of my pregnancy so I was mentally prepared when I was told there was no time for drugs (unlike with Lily when I didn't know I wasn't allowed to have one).
I pushed for a very short time and then at 3:06am there she was - 7 lbs, 3 oz and 21 inches long. According to Dr. Anderson, a very big baby for my body which was evident with fourth degree tearing, five layers of stitches, and the multiple blood vessels I popped in both eyes.
At three and a half weeks later, I still feel the labor consequences. Miralax is my best friend. TMI? It still hurts to sit, drive, and get out of bed. Progress is being able to walk to the mailbox. While my overall experience with Julia was better than with Lily, I wasn't prepared for the difference in recovery time. Not only was Lily smaller so delivery was "easier" with her, but she was in the NICU being cared for by a team of great nurses. Resting was on my time and physically recovering was much faster.
I want to say sorry not sorry if I haven't returned your phone call or text message right away. My doctor and our pediatrician have both stressed taking time for myself. And so, I'm taking time to be selfish - to sleep the day away, catch up on Netflix, read the stack of magazines I haven't had time for, and sometimes ignore the rest of the world. I am so grateful for our community of support which has helped me to be able to do this. With Lily, we had just moved into a new house and didn't know anyone in Cascade. I can honestly say we haven't cooked a meal since coming home from the hospital. This past weekend was the first time I folded my own laundry. Without being asked, Lily's teachers have shown her extra love and kept me updated that she hasn't missed a beat. We're slowly adjusting to being a family of four - I just keep reminding myself that someday I'll sleep through the night again.
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